Apples - Ian Dury & The Blockheads

Delilah the dancer from Soho
Was making her way down the lane
Simpson from Harrow
Had fruit on his barrow
He sold it for love and for gain

Simpson said, "Hello, young woman"
"My Pippins are lovely today"
"Don't be suspicious"
"Of Golden Delicious"
"Whatever your granny might say"

There only apples, red and green
Apples, lovely, ripe and juicy and especially for you
Right off me barrow, me old c*** sparrow
Apples, red and green

Delilah the dancer from Soho
Took ages to make up her mind
Simpson said, "Madam,"
"You'd know if you'd 'ad 'em"
"That these are the very best kind"

"This is the pick of the orchard"
"Forgive me a figure of speech"
"But apples like these here"
"Just don't grow on trees, dear"
"And this one is really a peach"

There only apples, red and green
Apples, lovely, ripe and juicy and especially for you
Right off my barrow, my old c*** sparrow
Apples, red and green

Simpson picked out a green apple
He polished it up on his sleeve
He said, "Do me a favour"
"And savour the flavour"
"Of what you're about to receive"

Delilah the dancer from Soho
Accepted his gift with a smile
She said, "It looks like a good 'un"
"It'll do for my pudden"
"I'll get round to it after a while"

There only apples, red and green
Apples, lovely, ripe and juicy and especially for you
Right off my barrow, my old c*** sparrow
Apples, red and green