I can scarf a dozen donuts
And lick the sugar off my hands
If I had a hundred tacos
I could eat 'em on command
If I eat 'em even faster
You can see my waist expand
But the bloated feeling that I get
Is the part that I can't stand
In the middle of the kitchen
I can't help but gain a pound
I'll never taste the thrill of victory
'Til I finally chow down
I can offer no defense
When that aroma fills the place
When I'm served a tray of burgers
I will gladly stuff my face
I can eat it all
Alfalfa sprouts and greens
But when it comes to fast food
I eat everything
I can eat it all
Whatever I desire
It's fat that I require
'Cause I'm a butterball
I can eat it all
The source of my condition
Is the fact I don't abstain
I can measure my consumption
By the weight that I have gained
Well, my friends call me a glutton
And that causes me such pain
If they serve me one more salad
I think I will go insane
'Cause I've laid aside the health food
For the fatter foods I've found
When I get my hands on pizza
I can never put it down
When I hit my favorite restaurants
I eat everything I see
After hours at the buffet
They are begging me to leave
I can eat it all
Alfalfa sprouts and greens
But when it comes to fast food
I eat everything
I can eat it all
Whatever I desire
It's fat that I require
'Cause I'm a butterball
I can eat it all
I have a favorite verse
I would like you all to know
And it goes like this
"Man cannot live by bread alone"
That is why I lay my ground beef
On a rolling flame of fire
The more I have, the more that I desire
I can eat it all
I can eat it all
Whatever I desire
It's fat that I require
'Cause I'm a butterball
I'm wider than I'm tall
I'm pure cholesterol
I can eat it all