Swiss Colony Beef Log - Eric Cartman

Stockings are hung on the chimney

And the presents are under the tree

And Mamma's in the kitchen

Making some, 'erbal tea

The windows are covered with frost

And the candles are all alight

But as I wander, through this quiet house

Something just doesn't seem right

You see, every year, the neighbours bring us

A Swiss Colony Beef Log

But the neighbours aren't around, around, around

There's no Beef Log to be found this year

No Beef Log

Christmas isn't Christmas

Without a Swiss Colony Beef Log

Without those cheeses and meats

I don't think I can get around

My mother tries to comfort me

She says "Here Son, have some egg nog"

I fucking hate egg nog, seriously

What do I see?

Underneath the tree?

Grandma got a Swiss Colony Beef Log just for me

Ah... Gravy!

Swiss Colony Beef Log, baby!

That's what Christmas is all about!

The roly-poly Colony Beef Log, baby!

Makes a little boy scream and shout!

Deck the halls with balls of Swiss Colony

La la la la la, la la, la la!

Sweet