Alton Towers - Macc Lads

Fucking right.
Bank holiday Monday,
Sunday Hours.
So let's fuck off to Alton Towers.
Ten to two, quite a few in the queue for the bumper cars.
Fit crack on the lake but her mate's got a flabby arse.

So let's hit the bars....
Where's the fucking pub?
Where's the fucking ale?
We don't want to queue for the mono-fucking rail.
Where's the fucking crack?
They're middle aged mums with big flabby bums.
Black hole queue's past the entrance gate now,
Well, I've been with Sweatty Betty and it's not worth the wait.

No!
I wouldn't stand in a queue for all the tea in China,
I'd rather lick the hairs on a dead dog's vagina,
Hair of the dog.
Where's the fucking pub?
Where's the fucking ale?
We don't want to queue for the mono-fucking rail.

Where's the fucking crack?
They're middle aged mums with big flabby bums.
Fuck cunt wank shit.
Where's the fucking pub?
Where's the fucking ale?
We don't want to queue for the mono-fucking rail.
(Repeat to end)