I'm My Own Grandpa - Guy Lombardo

Chorus:
I'm my own Grandpa (x2)
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
Oh, I'm my own Grandpa

Many many years ago
When I was twenty-three
I was married to a widow 
Who was pretty as can be
This widow had a grown up daughter
Who had hair of red
My father fell in love with her
And soon they too were wed

This made my Dad my son in-law
And changed my very life
For my Daughter was my Mother 
Cause' she was my Father's wife
To complicate the matter
Even though it brought me joy
I soon became the Father of a bouncing baby boy

My little baby then became
A brother in-law to Dad
And soon became my Uncle
Though it made me very sad
For if he was my Uncle
Then that also made him Brother
Of the widow's grown up Daughter
Who of course was my Step-Mother

Chorus

My Father's wife then had a Son
Who kept them on the run
And he became my Grandchild
For he was my Daughter's son
My Wife is now my Mother's Mother
And it makes me blue
Because although she is my wife
She's my Grandmother too

If my wife is my grandmother
Then I'm her Grandchild
And every time I think of it
It nearly drives me wild
For now I have become the strangest case you ever saw
As Husband of my Grandmother
I am my own Grandpa

Chorus (fades)