Junk Food Junkie - Larry Groce

Junk Food JunkieLarry GroceWritten by Larry GroceReleased by Warner Bros. Records in 1976; playing time, 3:03Was Groce's only hit, making it as high as #9 on the _Billboard_ Hot 100You know I love that organic cookingI always ask for moreAnd they call me Mr. NaturalOn down to the health food storeI only eat good sea saltWhite sugar don't touch my lipsAnd my friends is alwaysBegging me to take themOn macrobiotic tripsYes, they areOh, but at night I stake out my strongboxThat I keep under lock and keyAnd I take it off to my closetWhere nobody else can seeI open that door so slowlyTake a peek up north and southThen I pull out a Hostess TwinkieAnd I pop it in my mouthYeah, in the daytime I'm Mr. NaturalJust as healthy as I can beBut at night I'm a junk food junkieGood lord have pity on meWell, at lunchtimeYou can always find meAt the Whole Earth Vitamin BarJust sucking on my plain white yogurtFrom my hand thrown pottery jarAnd sippin' a little hand pressed ciderWith a carrot stick for dessertAnd wiping my faceIn a natural wayOn the sleeve of my peasant shirtOh yeahAh, but when that clock strikes midnightAnd I'm all by myselfI work that combinationOn my secret hideaway shelfAnd I pull out some Fritos corn chipsDr. Pepper and an Ole Moon PieThen I sit back in glorious expectationOf a genuine junk food highOh yeah, in the daytime I'm Mr. NaturalJust as healthy as I can beBut at night I'm a junk food junkieGood lord have pity on meMy friends down at the communeThey think I'm pretty neatOh, I don't know nothing about arts and craftsBut I give 'em all something to eatI'm a friend to old Euell GibbonsAnd I only eat homegrown spiceI got a John Keats autographed Grecian urnFilled up with my brown riceYes, I doOh, but folks lately I have been spotted With a Big Mac on my breathStumbling into a Colonel SandersWith a face as white as deathI'm afraid someday they'll find meJust stretched out on my bedWith a handful of Pringles Potato ChipsAnd a Ding Dong by my headIn the daytime I'm Mr. NaturalJust as healthy as I can beBut at night I'm a junk food junkieGood lord have pity on me---------------------------------------------------------------