Light Years Behind - Cardinal Sin

I can't believe this 
Will I throw it all away? 
It's been my whole life 
At least since I was young 
Bills stack up and don't get paid 
It doesn't feel right 
Keep my mouth shut and play along 
Seldom second guess every action 
This time I think I might have 
Wished I had done a few things differently 
All the crappy jobs, the drinks, and drugs 
Watching too much TV 
I feel I'm light years behind 
People the same age as me 
Can you blame me? 
Is this really a surprise? 
Hints weren't hidden 
All the doubt 
Keeps growing is size 
Did I ever lead you on? 
Not something I tried 
Hate to think I strung you along 
Hey, do I have to decide now? 
Wait, give me more time 
Hey, I really can't decide this now 
Wait, I need more time 
Don't return calls 
Been climbing walls 
The days I don't eat 
Liquor filled fights, the lonely nights 
Crying myself to sleep 
I feel I'm light years behind 
People the same age as me