Phony Calls - Weird Al Yankovic

Mom and dad are goin' out for the evening 
And you're stuck inside the house all alone 
That's when you decided it might be fun to harass someone 
Dial a random number up on your telephone 
You ask if their refrigerator is running 
Then you tell 'em they should go out and catch it 
Buddy, if they ever figured out where you were callin' 'em from 
They'd come and bust your head right in with a ratchet 
Listen to me 
Don't go makin' phony calls 
Please stick to the seven-digit numbers you're used to 
I know that you think it's funny drivin' folks up the wall 
But it's really gettin' old fast 

Little Melvin has a natural obsession 
Askin' for Prince Albert in a can 
He gets a kick each time he makes a collect call 
To some guy he doesn't know who lives in Japan 
He's callin' strangers up at three in the morning 
Gives 'em pizza pie delivery at four 
He won't be laughin when they're tracin' his line 
One day the phone police will be there at his door 
Yo, hear me 

Don't go makin' phony calls 
Only dial the seven-digit numbers you're used to 
Swear someday I'm gonna yank that phone cord right out from the wall 
How long is this phase gonna last? 
Come on 

Moe's bar, what'll ya eat, beat or drink? 
Uh, yeah, hello, is Mike there? Last name Rotch. 
Hold on. I'll check. Mike Rotch! Mike Rotch! Hey, has anybody seen Mike Rotch lately? 
Listen to me, you little puke. One of these days, I'm going to catch you, and I'm going to carve my name on your back with an ice pick! 

Don't go makin' phony calls 
Please stick to the seven-digit numbers you're used to 
You went through the New York City phone book and prank called 'em all 
Hope that you grow out of this fast 

Dont' go makin' phony calls, 
Please stick to the seven-digit numbers you're used to 
Betcha think it's funny when you're drivin' folks right up the wall 
But you're just a pain in the aaa....