That Party - Harry Connick, Jr.

Went to a little get-together
With some old friends.
Not much has changed,
Since the last time I saw them.

There's a chicken in uniform,
Wooden leg, and a matchstick arm.
Saying: "Left my wing back on the farm
...Tried the buffet..."

Tiny took a turn on steel guitar,
After he got a fresh feel for the bar.
Lines drawn of jellyfish caviar,
Saying: "Want to jam?"

[Chorus]
I don't like throwing
Parties like that,
But I love going.
They said: no guests;
So I thought of you.
Hey mama, it's on.

A disconcerted youth with a gun,
Wants to shoot up some fun,
Saying: "I'm failing science and math,
But I'm head of the class in murder one."

Balance sheets, impresarioed ballets,
And advertised for run-a-ways
That only dance on holidays.
When crutches cut in...

Willa was disenchanted,
Tossed her garter and demanded:
"Nothing can be recanted
If it was nothing to begin with."

A magician did card tricks
For a bunch of well-heeled hicks,
And held up a red six.
One said: "That's a black seven."

[Chorus]

A disconcerted youth with a gun;
That semi-precious son.
He needs to learn if you take a life,
You ain't got none.

Cracked pelicans rode magnolias.
Sent advice to rebel soldiers,
That all ended with: "I told ya so,
So then why do you ask?"

You can tell it's getting late,
When Cal calls himself Kate,
And peons hire potentates.
Saying: "When you finish,
Trim the hedges."

I'm making a hurried get-a-way,
Down Santa Monica, out of L.A.
If you like it so much, stay.
There's a theme park in the mix.

[Chorus]